Black Man Guilty of Using White Privilege: How Was This Possible?

By Keith Wimbley

Hello everyone, my name is Keith Wimbley, and I am the author of the book "No Banks Necessary." I am a Black man who's guilty of using white privilege.

In my book, I wrote about publishing a magazine, but what I didn't mention was that all the people I hired were white. At the time, I didn't see it as discrimination; I saw it as a smart business strategy. However, looking back, I can now recognize that it had become a habit after being in an interracial marriage and relationship for many years. I also didn't write in the book how, when I went to rent an office for the magazine, the landlord told me it had been rented. I knew he was lying, so once again, I was forced to use my white privilege. I called my wife and had her call the number we had written down for the space for rent. And sure enough, the owner told her a different story. See, I'm guilty! She made an appointment to see the office, and two days later, we went together. His excuse and claim were that someone had changed their mind, and in his mind, he had decided to rent the office before he actually showed it to me. That was not the first time I used my wife's white privilege, and it certainly was the last.

Now, back to only hiring an all-white staff! I'm not going to make an excuse for doing this, but I will give you a reason that seemed reasonable at the time. In my book "No Banks Necessary," I talk about how both my wife and I hit the streets with an example of what the magazine was going to look like and went downtown Mobile, Alabama, to talk to all the business owners. We split up and went to each bar and restaurant to talk to the owners. What I didn't say is that she got eight commitments to buy an ad, and I only got four. Now, I don't think that had anything to do with her being white and all the business owners being white.

Although my wife, for many years after I had become a business owner, had remained a job-mentality person, she learned how to become a top-notch salesperson. I will admit it to her over and over. She grew up as a shy and quiet person who actually turned red the first time I asked her for a kiss after hearing she had a crush on me. I, on the other hand, had been a salesperson for as long as I can remember. Even as a kid, the grown-ups would give me a quarter to act like the wrestlers they saw on TV. I grew up as a performer, and performing is selling. I grew up playing basketball and putting on a show for the crowd. Some of the white kids would pay me based on how many dunks I had in a game. I grew up playing the guitar and singing in churches. So selling has always been natural to me. But like I admitted to Amanda, I will be the first to say she was better at it than me. When you read the book "No Banks Necessary," you will see how I didn't mind her taking the lead when necessary. I am a 100% team-first kind of person.

So I can't say her white privilege got the most advertisement commitments because of the color of her skin that night. I can say her skills became the backbone of our financial stability, and I couldn't have achieved anything without her.

But an interesting thing happened that night. Just as we were about to leave, we saw the light on in another place near where we had parked. I asked my wife did she go inside to talk to those people, and she said no. So I turned the car on because it was a cold night and told her I would be right back. Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I went because she had gotten more commitments than me, but I can assure you that wasn't the case. I went because my wife deserved to sit in the warm car much more than I did. Truth be told, I would have let her stay in the car if she hadn't gotten any commitments. You will understand this more after you read the part in the book where I closed our dry cleaners because when I would come home, my wife looked like she had been crying more than our newborn. I could see she was miserable as a new mom, so I told her to go find a job to replace the income from the dry cleaners, and she did. I spent the next two years at home with our first son.

Anyway, the owner of the place that neither of us had entered was a Black man. It was the only Black business owner downtown. Once I walked through the door, I felt a relief. In my mind, I thought this was going to be easy. Boy, was I wrong! Not only did he not give me a commitment, but when I went back after the first issue was published, he gave me a no. So many things ran through my mind about that situation. I didn't know if I had made a mistake by not sending my wife in there because all of his distributors were white and that's what he was used to, or maybe I got thrown off my sales game when I saw the color of his skin and didn't perform at the level I was capable of. To this day, this haunts me! This was a nightlife magazine, and even after I transitioned into letting 9-to-5 businesses advertise, I had an unbelievable fear of approaching Black business owners. I just couldn't do it!

See, in life, there are things that shape us and turn us into whatever we're going to become, and I think it was that moment in my life that put me in the direction of being guilty of using white privilege.

At the same time, I am a man who believes wholeheartedly that we should confront our fears. After about six months of being in operation, I told my wife I didn't think I could live with myself if I didn't get at least one Black business owner alongside over 100 white business owners in the magazine. She said good luck, after asking if I needed her to do it with a smile. I said no and gestured to let her know I appreciated her support. So I went to Roger's BBQ about two hours after lunch the very next day, and as anticipated, he was there.

He said no, and I ordered enough BBQ for the entire family. When I got home, Amanda thought right away that we had struck a deal for advertising and had gotten food out of the deal. When I told her he said no, she got mad and asked why I bought food from there. I said I heard it was good, and we hadn't had BBQ from anywhere other than the place less than 200 yards from our house since we moved to Mobile. I don't know if it was not good because he said no or if the place up the street, Rich's BBQ, was just so much better, or maybe it was because we had gotten used to it. But I still put cinnamon in my BBQ sauce to this day.

So my wife asked me what I was going to do. I guess she thought I was hurt again like the first time a Black business owner told me no, but I wasn't. I was relieved that I had gained the confidence to approach Black business owners again. The very next day, I got up with the intention of visiting another Black business owner's establishment. So when Amanda asked what I was going to do that day, I said I would find another Black-owned BBQ restaurant, and that's exactly what I did. The place is called Saucy Q, and it's still there today. The last time I checked, he had three locations now. He told me what to say in his ad within 15 minutes of being there. He wrote me a check and yelled to the back to tell his wife to bring this man some BBQ so he could get excited about designing our ad. He asked if I had any children, and I said one. He said he should get to work and told me to enjoy the BBQ. We did, and it was good! But now I have leftover BBQ to compare to each other, and I don't know if Saucy Q tastes the best because I had conquered my fear and had a check from them. But from what I hear, it's the best in Mobile, Alabama.

So why am I a Black man guilty of using white privilege? I can only guess it was this story that shaped the way I looked at things when I started to hire people to sell advertising. Before you judge me, think about this. If one Black business owner can discourage a guy who had spent decades being the most confident person in the room, imagine what it would do to a young salesperson getting five rejections their first day. I saw it as simple as using every advantage at my fingertips. I often ask myself if I would do it again, knowing what I've learned over the years, and my answer is no. Because I would train whomever and tell them stories like this one and some of the other ones in my book "No Banks Necessary." But for now, I'm a Black man guilty of using white privilege. For the record, in all the other businesses I owned that you will read about, 90% of my employees were Black.

In closing, I understand everyone takes rejections differently and sometimes personally. After I published "No Banks Necessary," I texted the news to two of the only friends I keep up with on Facebook from my college days. One of those friends wrote a book two years ago, and when he called me and told me, I bought the book right after I got off the phone with him. But he wasn't the friend who bought my book after I told them. I understand the sales game, and I know some will. Some won't; so what? That's how it works. But that's a situation I took personally, and it reminded me of that moment 27 years ago. So I sent a Facebook message to over 4,000 friends—not expecting them to buy my book, but expecting them to motivate me to find 8,000 new friends who will.

Thank you! Keith Wimbley